Monday, 4 March 2013

Independence in marriage

When I married the Photographer, I promised to love, honour and obey. The last word is important to me not just because of traditions, but because I trust my husband to know what is best for us. This does not mean that I am the invisible partner, it means that when we've discussed important decisions, I will follow my husband's lead on the outcome.

We are not intended to be clones of one other - marriage brings us closer in order that we can compliment one another. The Photographer's personality sparks mine as mine does his; our strengths cover the other's weaknesses and together we are stronger than we are apart.

Lately I have been realising that in order to compliment one another, we must also work on our own independence within marriage. We need to ensure that our personalities don't just blend into one unidentifiable bland character, but instead are fortified by one another.

Whether independence means more time to hang out just me and my girls, more time to pursue our individual passions or simply doing household chores without the other, I'm discovering that an element of independence is important to keep my own spark, in order to encourage the Photographer's.

It is easy to become wrapped up in one another's lives in any relationship but when you lose sight of yourself, you risk losing the goodness that makes you one half of a whole.

I love how my life and the Photographer's have become entwined, I love that his strengths have worked on my weaknesses and I love that time spent in his company makes me so content. I also love that as we walk this road, we are recapturing and retaining our own independence so that when we are together, we are even more grounded than before.

Much love,
xx

2 chocolates:

Sarah of 'Catching the Magic' said...

So, so true x I love the way you write about your relationship so openly and with such perspective.

Ally said...

Absolutely! After all our individual personalities and independence is part of what attracts us to each other....but marriage definitely can make it harder to maintain that. Great post!

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